At 25, Lexi Goldberg is familiar with she’s youthful to be thinking about marriage. However, she insists she’s constantly been an old soul at heart and isn’t the variety to perform online games — when she commits, she commits. “If we’re relationship, I’m making an attempt to figure out if it is you and me,” Goldberg, who is bicoastal in between Miami and Los Angeles, tells Elite Everyday. If you’re not down for that amount of transparency, you’re most likely not proper for her.

Spoiler warn: This post is made up of spoilers from The Ultimatum: Queer Love finale and reunion. That amount of self-consciousness and assurance is what built Goldberg a standout on Netflix’s The Ultimatum: Queer Really like. She joined the exhibit with her associate, Raelyn Cheung-Sutton, because Goldberg needed to get married and Cheung-Sutton was not all set still. The show’s premise asks contestants to break up with their associate for a a few-7 days “trial marriage” with an individual else from the cast. To state the clear, it receives messy quick. Goldberg paired up with Mal Wright, but their link never ever formulated previous a friendship, and she finished up getting engaged to Cheung-Sutton in the finale (which aired June 7).

But wait around, there is much more — though Goldberg and Cheung-Sutton had been fortunately with each other when the reunion demonstrate taped a couple months in the past, a quick be aware at the stop revealed they’ve considering that damaged up. (Nonetheless keeping up?) To get her POV on the full scenario, Elite Day-to-day questioned Goldberg about her time on the present, her existing romantic relationship status, and what she liked most about her demo relationship with Wright.

Elite Everyday: Now that The Ultimatum: Queer Enjoy is out, how do you experience about persons currently being in a position to watch such a vulnerable experience in your everyday living?

Lexi Goldberg: It’s unquestionably the most humbling and odd experience of my everyday living. There were some times during filming wherever I was pondering, “Oh, I want to view that once again. Thank God they filmed it.” Then there were being other times I would have somewhat just allow pass. It absolutely puts your complete lifetime in the spotlight, but I’m happy of who I am and the way I carried myself.

ED: You had been 24 during filming — a person of the youngest individuals there — however you have been the just one to problem the ultimatum in your relationship. When did you know you were being ready for relationship?

LG: I’ve constantly followed my intestine, and I stand by the reality that when you sense one thing for someone, you ought to reside that authentically. I’m not the kind of person who likes to participate in game titles or drag some thing out for months on close. With Rae, I was receiving to a position in which I needed to start creating those people commitments.

ED: I want to hear more about the predicament with Vanessa and Rae — they hooked up through their trial relationship, and you were understandably quite upset. Did that enjoy out the way you keep in mind issues?

LG: It played out in alignment with how I was feeling. There is this second in the trailer where by I explained “I don’t give a sh*t about the intercourse.” Because for me, it was not about the intercourse. After you get around the first damage of someone remaining personal with the person you really like, you imagine, “Why did they do it? Do they have inner thoughts for this person?” It was so obvious there weren’t inner thoughts of romance [between Vanessa and Rae].

I did not appear on this exhibit to have a fun very little spring crack hiatus in lifetime. If I wished to do that, I assume I would’ve just asked Rae for a crack. In the present, we get a very good bird’s eye see into who Vanessa is, but as another person who saw her each individual day, I do not agree with her character. And that definitely struck a nerve for me.

ED: Wherever do you stand with Vanessa now? Do you two speak at all?

LG: No. She appreciates how I feel, and we’re under no circumstances heading to be individuals who wander via lifetime in the very same place unless of course we’re unquestionably pressured to. I assume she blocked me on Instagram, and it is what it is. I hope she grows in existence. I would like practically nothing but the most effective for her if she learns how to be a significantly superior human becoming and specific. But no, I’m unquestionably by no means heading to take her out to a bar to seize beverages.

ED: Very well, on a a lot more constructive be aware, I want to inquire about your demo marriage with Mal. What drew you two together?

LG: Mal felt like loved ones. She has unquestionably changed the way I search at like, simply because when you are upcoming to anyone who feels like house — who feels risk-free, comfortable, and celebrates you for who you are — that is all you can definitely question for in a spouse. She did a excellent job of in no way telling me to convert down the quantity on my temperament — even the quirkiest, funniest, or most irritating components of me. She was just Team Me.

Plus, we had so significantly exciting collectively. She’s nevertheless detailed in my phone as “wife.” I actually assume the way I managed myself all over the present is a reflection of the man or woman I bought to live with, and I bought the very best hand I could have been dealt with her.

ED: Did you ever contemplate pursuing anything at all intimate with Mal?

LG: I did, yeah. For the initially couple weeks of our trial marriage, we were just getting exciting and then dealing with all the madness about us. But in the last week with Mal, there was a second I can try to remember in which I considered “Do I want to kiss her suitable now? What is happening in this article?” Then there was this second in bed the place I was getting playful with her in a way that felt flirtatious. We talked about it afterward, and she suggests she considered the very same matter.

But honestly, I really don’t assume both of us felt like we could have explored that entirely and managed it with ample care. I really do not know what would’ve occurred if I had kissed Mal, but I’m grateful that we didn’t do nearly anything reckless that might have jeopardized how vital she is to me.

ED: You finished up engaged to Rae, but we discovered out at the conclude of the reunion that you two broke up. Can you share just about anything a lot more about that?

LG: There had been elements of my relationship with Rae in which I toned down who I was. Seeing the demonstrate again, I seen how vivid I was all-around Mal compared to the way I was significantly less of myself about Rae. It was a small humbling. On top rated of that, there ended up wounds [between Rae and me] that came back up from the present that had been possibly never ever going to mend. We experienced a fantastic 4-year partnership, and I’m respectful and appreciative of everything we constructed, but there are things I prioritize that I just don’t assume she could have offered me.

ED: What is your partnership status now?

LG: I am really a great deal viewing someone, and I have hardly ever been so satisfied and in appreciate. Just one of the initial matters I instructed her was “You make me really feel the way Mal created me come to feel, and I could not inquire for anything at all far more.” The expression “twin flame” has become genuinely mainstream, and people today use it in a cavalier way, but I actually really feel like we had been ripped from the exact same fabric and now we’re sewing ourselves back again collectively. It’s the most incredible relationship I’ve at any time had.

ED: I’m hunting ahead to the really hard start. Talking of social media, I noticed you are huge on OnlyFans — how did you get started out doing that?

LG: After the present finished filming, I was hoping to examine my imaginative aspect more, and I was earning some TikToks. Of course, I have actually big boobs, and I was receiving opinions from persons declaring “You received an OnlyFans?” So I made the decision to try out it.

As substantially as OnlyFans can be this taboo factor, it gave me agency about my possess system in a way that I have in no way experienced in advance of. I have in no way felt sexier, more at ease, or much more in a position to discover conversations with persons from so quite a few unique walks of existence. I have experienced practically nothing but favourable experiences with subscribers. I’m truly very pleased of what I’ve developed there, and I will constantly be a champion for gals earning decisions to help themselves.

ED: That self-assurance shines by way of in the show, way too. What is a fear you utilised to have about associations you have get over due to the fact likely on The Ultimatum?

LG: My major panic, and I also preface this as a queer human being, is that I was going to have to compromise mainly because I wouldn’t discover someone who in shape what I essential. When your dating pool is lesser, there can be a anxiety that you’ll just have to forgive particular items, but the most important issue I want to inform men and women is that you deserve everything you want. Don’t settle on issues that matter to you, for the reason that I, in the midst of a Tv set display, uncovered somebody who was almost everything I could have ever desired in a human being. Mal gave all of that to me inside of five minutes of meeting her, and I recognized you don’t need to settle for a lot less.

ED: Getting absent by way of this working experience, what’s your ideal piece of marriage advice for our audience?

LG: Abide by your coronary heart. If you want to notify any person you like them, tell them. If you want to request any person to be your girlfriend immediately after five minutes, they may possibly not say indeed, but do it. My present relationship has long gone so well because I started adhering to my gut, and when I wanted to say “I like you,” I just mentioned it. When I desired to ask her to be my girlfriend, I did it. When I required to go in with her, we did that, far too.

ED: It’s apparent you’re definitely joyful now. What does enjoy necessarily mean to you?

LG: Really like implies feeling definitely at peace with yourself and being with any individual who helps make you sense remarkable. Love isn’t intended to make you experience uncomfortable or completely wrong about who you are, the way you seem, or the way you stroll through everyday living. It should be a celebration of two individuals coming together precisely as they are, and recognizing that when they’re collectively, they’re much better than when they’re by them selves.

This job interview has been condensed and edited for clarity.